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health advisory Hospital Mental Health 2007-11-15 19:01:59

you should check with your psychiatrist,are you on your regular medication?if your condition is not a part of psychotic process,then it is a kind of violence catharsis against your self,which is not a good thing ,ask your doctor for help.

Dr solo

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I have had BP I mixed for 15 years too, and take my medications & keep every psych appointment, but at the onset, my explosive anger was very difficult, almost impossible, to control through willpower or rationale, but I didn't direct at myself. Of course, every dish and breakable object at home eventually got smashed and whoever got near me was in clear danger. But whether you are physically hurting yourself or others when your illness is unstable, it's the same thing. Feeling a bit better after you violently lash out on yourself simply means you vented anger and hostility and spent your energies for the time being. You're right, it's not healthy, draws negative attention if anything, and you should want to live and enjoy life like you deserve. That is why you're here asking this, because you don't want or like getting this angry to the point of hitting yourself and punching out whatever is closest and the best thing you could do to get a foothold on it is to talk to your psychiatrist or psychologist about these bad outbursts because obviously you're not completely stabilized with the meds you're on right now and need a bit of help to gain control. I was so bad that the police were tired of coming and when I broke two bones, they said, "Good. Maybe now you'll tell your doctor the truth and get some medication so we can stop coming here every time you go off." And although I didn't want to have to add one more medication to my daily meds and didn't believe it could help something so strong, I tried my best, and soon there came a point when something triggered the anger and I could feel it rushing and boiling up--and it was like having a "pause" button that allowed me to hesitate and think, "Do I want or need to go through this crap? I'm going to go lay down and calm down." It didn't just disappear when I began a new medication, but I did make tremendous strides in understanding why I did it and how to keep control. And I'm proud now that my husband stayed with me all the way and most people don't know or wouldn't suspect how severely afflicted I once was with Bipolar I. My best to you, and good luck.

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Try to reason with weird feeling...ever seen beatiful mind? We go crazy when we think nothing makes any sense any more. Try to define your own logic in it. Ask yourself, "Why I am so mad at myself that I have to do this? Why do I feel better after hurting myself? What kind of satisfaction is there?" Don't give up, keep trying, and find pattern on why and how it happens. There must have some triggers here and there. Now it might start to make sense. Then maybe you can find something else that could give you the same kind of satisfaction other than hurting yourself. Or maybe there is some daily habit that keeps pulling the trigger on you. Stay away from them.

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