I need help I cant stop crying I have cuts all over my body
I was raped when I was 9.
Now I'm 22 and I usually get myself into trouble.
There are times that I get the feeling that I like to be abused sexually. I look for people who would hurt me and then after they've abused me I cry and hate myself and would usually cut myself.
I can't disguss this with my psychologist because I'm not ok about it and I feel humiliated if I do.
What's wrong with me?
I know I have to tell my psychologist but I can't find the courage.
Answer:Please write a letter to your psychologist and put it in an envelope,and tell him or her not to open it until you leave give him your phone number and haave him call you as soon as he reads it.You are feeling rejected and you feel like you deserve it so you continue to find those type of poeple to punish you,and then the pain is so bad that you want to cut your self because that pain is better.you probable wont believe me but you dont deserve whats been happening to you go to Jesus he loves you more than youll ever comprehind. Im sorry baby but dont be afraig to tell your docter.
dont know ... find a fun hobby!!=)
If you can't go see a therapist, at least contact someone by phone. I know that many social workers and clergy are trained in counselling and crisis management. They don't have to know your name or see you, they just listen and talk to you, and maybe that will help give you the courage to go and meet someone face to face