Why does my boyfriend watch porn

I've been with him for over 3 years. I don't understand. Am I not good enough? We have plenty of sex so I know that's not the reason for him watching it. It just makes me feel bad. I've talked with him about it and he said me not being good enough has nothing to do with it. Now I just let it go because I don't want to start fights over it. I just want to know! If there are any guys out there who could explain with serious answers, it would help. Thanks!

Mandy,

First, let's refer to it as erotica. Porn is just a pejorative term, and what I would call the "cheaply made stuff."

Erotica has been around for thousands of years. It began as painting, sculpture and poetry, and eventually evolved into literature, photography, acting, and video.

Erotica is simply an alternative form of sexual arousal; it is harmless fantasy and nothing more.

Regarding fantasy, Helen Fisher ("The First Sex," Ballantine Books, Feb. 2000) says that 71 percent of men and 72 percent of women fantasize while having sex with a partner. Men fantasize about conquest and domination, women about submission and surrender.

Dr. Joyce Brothers says, "It might relieve some of your guilt to know that many happily married individuals who have no thought or intention of ever betraying their spouse have sexual fantasies about someone other than their spouse."

Both men and women (single and in a relationship) have shown a desire to enjoy erotica in some form.