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health advisory Hospital Mens Health 2007-11-15 4:32:08

If a man can get stimulation by looking elsewhere (vids, mags, strip clubs etc.) but has problems with his partner, it's not that he has ED. Obviously, there is not much attraction to stimulate him or his partner has let his/her looks go significantly. Is this common in those with ED aside from those that can't regardless of what stimulates him?

Answer:

I would think that it may have something to do with the condition of the relationship and how he feels about the other person. Some people...although attractive on the outside, could have internal things that are unattractive to the other person, therefore causing less of an attraction. That's all I could come up with anyway lol

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Yes, it's common. And it indicates a relationship issue, not a medical problem. I encourage you to seek counseling. Good luck.

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I had "ED" with my ex... but only with my ex. She wasnt physically unattractive... but her attitude and demeanor left much to be desired in our romantic relationship. My desire for the meaningful relationship that she couldnt provide me put a serious damper on my sexual performance. I just didnt feel the love, the emotional connection that I was seeking. She was in it for the sex, I wasnt. Essentially, sex with her was a turn off... because it was the only thing I was getting, the only reason we hung out. It was meaningless. It was more of an obligation to keep her around, while I constantly fought to establish meaning where there was none, to keep the relationship passionate and strong, to maintain emotional connection. Sex in the beginning was good... when it was new... when it was passionate and romantic. But once I realized that sex was the only thing that mattered to her, the entire basis and content of the relationship, it didnt matter any more. It got old and stale, as shallow as she was. Oh well, you cant make someone love you. Keep in mind, guys dont just want a hole to stick it in. They want to be wanted, to be pursued... to be seen as sex in the eyes of the woman... but a lot of men, like me, dont want to waste time in relationships that wont lead anywhere idealistic.

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It is not a matter of what attracts him. If a man has no problem getting an erection without his partner present but can't maintain one when she is there, that is not her problem. It is possible he has some repressed issues. This person should seek counseling to get to the bottom of it.

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I have found that in alot of cases its not the partners fault. Some guys can be really horny and turned on but not be able to get it up. And all of this could be because of something as simple as what he drinks or eats. If hes drinking alot of carbonated drinks, this could be happening. Or, he could just be bored with his partner. But then again, if hes having too much sex, his body could be causing that..

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normally no, because men are horn dogs. lingerie can get them hard, thats just looking at it. someone that is revolting maybe, but if it has t*ts and a hole most men will respond

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ED is Erectile Disfunction and that's just a sugar coated term meaning he's impotent. It can be caused by many thngs but if he is able to get an erection from any kind of visual stimulation, e.g. stripppers, porn, etc. he doesn't have ED. He has some other kind of a problem.

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