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health advisory Hospital Mens Health 2007-11-15 4:31:40

Your situation could be caused by other physical problems like any medication you are on, lack of sleep, smoking, illicit drugs, stress, etc.

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consider yourself lucky!

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Sounds like you have a mental rather than a physical problem. You only recently lost your virginity, and you are probably overly concerned about your performance in bed. Try to relax!

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i assume you can ejaculate when you masterbate or if she performs oral sex on you. if you can't even then, there could be a deeper problem that you need to see a doctor or urologist for. but at your age, I don't think that's much of a problem.

it's obviously either mental or physical.

if it's physical, then you need to try different positions. some positions are going to feel different and make it easier for your to ejaculate. not only do you get to ejaculate, but you get to have fun in the process. you might also have a hard time because your body gets tired and therefore the blood rushes away from your penis and to the rest of your body. if that's the case, slow it down. take your time and you'll be fine.

if it's a mental thing, again, no worries. the first time you have sex is always a little nerve wracking, especially with someone you care for. couple that with the stress of not being able to ejaculate and you end up putting yourself in a self fulfilling cycle because all you can think about is that you can't ejaculate. your best bet is to try to stop thinking so much about ejaculation. sometimes fantasizing can help. otherwise, try to get into the moment. if your girlfriend is open to it, maybe watching pornography (or even soft porn) will help.